A player tried to negotiate with aliens. “We come in peace!”
Alien: “Did you just insult my mother?” 👽
A player was attacked by space pirates. “Surrender your ship!”
Pirates: “And... share your Netflix password!” 🏴☠️
A player encountered a space monster. “What’s our defense system?”
Ship AI: “We have a laser pointer!” 😱
A Star Atlas player overloaded their cargo ship. “Why is it moving so slow?”
Ship AI: “It’s carrying your hopes and dreams.” 🚢
A player activated warp drive. Instead of teleporting, the ship went in circles. “Looks like we’re warping... around nothing.” 🚀
A Star Atlas player checked the fuel price for their ship.
“This costs more than the ship itself!” 🤯
A Star Atlas player bought a brand-new spaceship.
First flight: “Why is it spinning?” Ship AI: “I thought you liked drifting!” 🛸
A Star Atlas player tried to time travel. “I’ll go to the future!”
5 minutes later: “I just went 5 minutes into the past.” ⏰
A Star Atlas player ordered pizza to space. 2 hours later: “Why isn’t it here?”
Delivery: “The space-time continuum has delayed it.” ⏳
A Star Atlas player got a space traffic ticket. “How did this happen?”
Officer: “You were speeding near the asteroid belt.” 🚔
A Star Atlas player decided to go camping in space. “This is going to be amazing!”
2 hours later: “Why is my tent floating away?” ⛺
A Star Atlas player embarked on an important space mission. "This is the big one!"
5 minutes later: “I ran out of fuel and drifted into a black hole.” 🕳️
A Star Atlas player ordered pizza for delivery in space.
30 minutes later: “Where’s my pizza?” Delivery guy: "I got stuck in an asteroid belt.” 🍕
A Star Atlas player was flying through space when the spaceship suddenly started playing music. "What’s happening?"
The ship replied: “I’m in the mood for a space disco!” 🪩
A Star Atlas player saw a black hole and said, “I’ll avoid it!” They flew straight into it. “Oops, guess I’m taking the scenic route.” 🌌
A Star Atlas player bought a luxury spaceship. “I’m finally living the high life!”
2 minutes later: “I forgot to buy the fuel.” ⛽
A Star Atlas player saved up for the best spaceship. “Finally, I can afford it!”
10 minutes later: “I think I just bought a space scooter.” 🛴
A Star Atlas player tried customizing their spacecraft. “This is going to be amazing!”
5 minutes later: “My ship looks like a space donut.” 🍩
A Star Atlas explorer said, “I’m going to discover a new planet today!”
5 minutes later: “Oops, I discovered an asteroid field.” 💥
A Star Atlas player ordered a space taxi. Driver: “Where to?”
Player: “I don’t know, just take me away from the black hole!” 🚖
A Star Atlas player put on the latest space suit. “I look amazing!”
10 minutes later: “Why am I still freezing in deep space?” 🥶
A Star Atlas player went for a space job interview. Interviewer: “What’s your experience?”
Player: “I once flew through a black hole and lived to tell the tale.” 🕳️
A Star Atlas player tried mining an asteroid.
10 minutes later: “I’ve just mined 5,000 tons of space junk.” 🗑️
A Star Atlas player booked a tour of the galaxy.
Guide: “You’ll see stars, black holes, and one very expensive asteroid.” 💎
A Star Atlas player ran out of fuel in the middle of a journey. “Looks like I’ll be floating for a while…” 🚀
A Star Atlas player activated warp speed. “I’m flying faster than ever!”
10 minutes later: “Oh no, I’ve overshot the galaxy.” 🌠
A Star Atlas player tried to build a space station.
6 months later: “I’m still waiting on the blueprint.” 📜
A Star Atlas player got stuck in a space traffic jam. "I thought the galaxy was endless, but apparently, it’s rush hour." 🚦
A Star Atlas player applied for a space job. Interviewer: "So, what are your skills?"
Player: "I can mine asteroids and avoid black holes." 🕳️
A Star Atlas trader bought a rare artifact. "It was an investment!"
10 minutes later: "Okay, maybe not.” 💎