Red Jokes - Page 1

Why do miners always have red eyes? 👀

They’re either staring at charts or fixing rigs at 3 a.m. 🔧

No one can predict diarrhea… or crypto

Boy: "Everything’s lining up, the charts and the news, I’m going to make money soon!"

Girl: "Lining up? You’ve already gone through crypto diarrhea and don’t even realize it!"

Boy: "It’s not diarrhea, it’s just a temporary correction!"

Girl: "Your correction will soon be on the toilet, enjoy your meal!" 💩🚽

Play-to-earn games: I won, but we’re still in the red

Boy: "I won in a play-to-earn game! We can get back everything we lost!"

Girl: "You won 100 tokens, but the debt is still a thousand."

Boy: "But look, our balance is growing!"

Girl: "It seems you forgot that tokens won’t buy us food!" 🍔📉

Bitcoin and its multilayered personality

Investor 1: "Did you hear Bitcoin went up again?"

Investor 2: "Yeah, it’s like a multilayered cake — you never know what the next layer will be!" 🎂🎢

Investor 1: "Exactly, just better stay away from the bottom layer!" 😅

What do cryptocurrencies do when they are tired?

They go into "sleep" mode!

What does cryptocurrency do when it's bored?

It goes to zero and hopes someone will buy it!

Splinterlands Overpowered Monster

A Splinterlands player upgraded their monster to the max. “Now, no one can defeat me!”

10 seconds later: “Why is it just sitting there doing nothing?” 🤷‍♂️

Gods Unchained Overpowered God

A new God was so overpowered in Gods Unchained that the developers called it “Pay-to-Pray.” 🙏

Star Atlas Credit Card

Why don’t Star Atlas spaceships use credit cards? They’re already in too much “space debt.” 🛸

Ethereum on the Red Carpet:

"Ethereum, how does it feel to be on the red carpet?"
"It’s amazing! All these blocks are just rolling out for me!"
"And what about your dress?"
"Oh, it’s an exclusive Proof-of-Stake gown—sustainable, low-energy, and elegant!"
"Do you have a date?"
"Yes, I’m going with my Layer-2 partner. We make a perfect pair!" 💃

The Drop That Makes You Question Your Ability to Predict the Market

I thought I could predict crypto, but after this drop, I’m considering starting a career in fortune telling.
At least they have a crystal ball.

When Gas Fees Hit Harder Than the Red Light

In Squid Game, you freeze at the red light. In crypto, you freeze when you see the gas fees after making a trade!

Red Light, Green Light, Buy Crypto

In Squid Game, it’s red light, green light. In crypto, it’s red market, green market—except no one knows when it’s safe to move!

When the Price Goes Red

In Squid Game, you’re eliminated when you move on red. In crypto, you’re eliminated when your portfolio turns red!

Token Red Light, Green Light

You thought you were safe holding tokens... But now, every time you check the price, you freeze like you’ve just seen a red light!

Crypto-Powered Blender

I bought a crypto-powered blender.

It makes smoothies… but only after a 30-minute transaction confirmation. 🍓🔄

Related Categories

market gas fees token crypto price goes ethereum diarrhea splinterlands miners drop bitcoin games red light buy cryptocurrency gods unchained star atlas card monster god cryptocurrencies always one
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