She didn’t know I meant GPUs! 🖥️
Day 1: Found a tweet saying, “This coin will 100x! 🚀.” Bought $100 worth. Feeling like a genius.
Day 2: The same account tweets, “Oops, sold too soon.” Coin is down 50%.
Day 3: Another influencer says, “Diamond hands 💎🤲, don’t sell!” HODL mode activated.
Day 7: Coin is now worth $20. Decided to sell, but gas fees are $25.
Day 10: Saw a tweet, “The dip is your chance to buy!” Spent the remaining $20.
Day 30: My $100 investment has turned into a $5 meme NFT. But hey, I’m part of the community now!
Boy: "I invested in Upland and now I can cash out money!"
Girl: "Don’t you think you’re risking more than if you went on vacation with diarrhea?"
Boy: "I hope it’ll pay off!"
Girl: "I hope you’re not the first one to exit the game while sitting on the toilet." 💩🎲
Boy: "I invested all my money in Upland, hoping to get rich!"
Girl: "Are you sure this is the best plan? Maybe you should treat your diarrhea instead?"
Boy: "But in Upland, you can win huge money!"
Girl: "You know that with Upland money, you can't even treat diarrhea!" 💩💸
Boy: "I invested in tokens, and I think this is a gold mine!"
Girl: "A gold mine, you say? It’s more like diarrhea: sometimes it feels good, but then it’s not what you expected!"
Boy: "You don’t get it, there’s going to be big growth!"
Girl: "Or there’s going to be a big... explosion on the toilet!" 💩🚽
Boy: "I invested everything in this token, and it’s dropping!"
Girl: "Oh, it’s like diarrhea: at first, you think everything’s fine, and then you’re sitting there not knowing what to do with it."
Boy: "But I was hoping for growth!"
Girl: "You’re not alone. Many hoped, and now everything’s in 💩."
Boy: "I thought we’d save on the wedding to invest in crypto."
Girl: "I thought you wanted to save for a ring."
Boy: "But look, your engagement stone is now on the blockchain!" 💍🔗
Girl: "I don’t need a wedding with cryptocurrency. I want a real diamond!" 💎
Investor 1: "Are you okay? Why so stressed?"
Investor 2: "I put everything into crypto, and now my card just says 'zero'!"
Investor 1: "Don’t worry, this is not a lottery — just a long road to winning!" 🎯
Investor 2: "I hope it’s not a road to bankruptcy!" 💸
Investor 1: "I don’t even know what to think about cryptocurrency — everything is going up and down!"
Investor 2: "The key is not to panic! Like driving a manual car: just grip the wheel tighter!" 🚗💨
Investor 1: "What if I break the gearbox?"
Investor 2: "Well, then we’ll just change the strategy!" 😂
Person: "I invested all my money in crypto!"
Friend: "Are you crazy?!"
Person: "Well, I hope these losses are just a temporary setback!" 🤷♂️💸
Friend: "Looks like you lost not just your money but your pants too!" 👖😂
A crypto investor buys a token.
A month later, someone asks: "How's it going?"
He replies: "It was a bit negative, but I trust the crypto waves. I think they’ll lift me up again!" 🌊💹
A week later, they ask again: "Well, did you manage to rise?"
The answer: "I don’t know, looks like the wave was too strong – now I’m at the bottom!" 😂📉
"Don’t worry, it will go up again!"
"I’m looking for growth, but so far, just falling!"
To ride the waves of market volatility. 🚤🌊
Because they were feeling down with all the gas fees. ⛽💸
Because good luck hiding when your wallet is always on the blockchain! 🔒📲
Because they wanted to mark their spot in the blockchain. 💉⛓️
Because they were feeling under the blockchain. 🤒⛓️
Because they lost their keys. 🔑💸
Because they heard the drinks were on the house. 🍸🏠
Because they were feeling under the blockchain. 🤒⛓️
Because they lost their keys. 🔑💸
Because they heard the drinks were on the house. 🍸🏠
A Star Atlas investor said, “All my funds went into a black hole!” Accountant: “That’s the crypto market for you.” 🌌
Why did the Axie invest in crypto?
Because it knew it was all about “staking” the right assets! 💎
"Why does Ethereum make such great investments?"
"Because it’s always looking for long-term scalability!"
"Is it risk-free?"
"Not exactly... but Ethereum’s got a pretty smart contract strategy!"
"Sounds like a crypto genius!"
"Exactly! It knows how to stake its claim!" 💰
Every drop makes me question my strategy.
Should I just invest in socks? At least they don’t dip.
Because when the price drops, you need something to soften the fall!
A crypto investor went to a fortune teller and asked, "What’s my future?" The fortune teller said, "You will make a lot of money in crypto." The investor got excited until she added, "But you'll also lose it all… and then make it back… and lose it again."
Because when they said "red light," he was too busy checking his portfolio!