It heard Ethereum was slimming down and got jealous!
Turned my scholarship into crypto. Now I’m majoring in regret.
Can’t afford groceries? Don’t worry, just live on hope and altcoin predictions.
Because it's the only coin they can afford!
They asked, “Is that like planting seeds?” 🌱
But my wife says I only dig myself into debt.
Boy: "I just spent all my money buying cards in Splinterlands, and now I don’t even have money for toilet paper!"
Girl: "Do you really think you’ll earn more from this game than you spent?"
Boy: "Yes, if I get rare cards, I can sell them and make a ton of coins!"
Girl: "Well, I hope you can use the coins as toilet paper at least." 🧻💩
Boy: "My heroes are defeating everyone in CryptoBlades, and I kept cashing out tokens!"
Girl: "Yeah, you cashed out tokens, and now your heroes are defeating enemies in the bathroom!" 🚽💩
Boy: "But this is just the beginning, I believe in my success!"
Girl: "You believe in crypto success, not in your ability to defeat diarrhea!" 💩🏆
Boy: "I bought tokens, now I’m a CryptoBlades hero!"
Girl: "You’ll be a hero until you face the same heroic diarrhea after your crypto meals!" 💩🍕
Boy: "But I made huge profits!"
Girl: "Profits in the game, but zero in real life! You’ve become a winner only in virtual reality!" 🏆💩
Boy: "I invested in Bitcoin, and its price skyrocketed!"
Girl: "Be careful, it could be like diarrhea: it starts with a small amount, and then you can’t stop!"
Boy: "That’s a great sign of growth!"
Girl: "Growth? You’ll end up on the toilet with that crypto!" 💩📉
Girl: "What did you do with our money?"
Boy: "I put everything into Bitcoin, it’s growing again!"
Girl: "Yeah, growing... but not as fast as our debt is!"
Boy: "You know, crypto is the future!"
Girl: "Listen, the future is when we have at least money for food!" 🍞💔
Boy: "Look at Bitcoin’s rise, we’re on the verge of becoming millionaires!"
Girl: "We’re on the verge of something else — bankruptcy!"
Boy: "But if Bitcoin hits $100,000, everything will be fine!"
Girl: "Just like your attempts to convince me to invest in crypto instead of gold!" 📉💔
Investor 1: "Do you believe in stablecoins?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, there’s one stable thing about them: they don’t grow steadily!" 😂💵
Investor 1: "So, it’s more like a couch you sit on?"
Investor 2: "Exactly! Comfortable, but with no surprises!" 🛋️
Investor 1: "Did you know meme coins can really make money?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, it’s like betting on a cat winning in chess!" 🐱♟️
Investor 1: "Well, if the cat can win, why not?" 😅
Investor 1: "Did you hear Bitcoin went up again?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, it’s like a multilayered cake — you never know what the next layer will be!" 🎂🎢
Investor 1: "Exactly, just better stay away from the bottom layer!" 😅
Investor 1: "Are you in Dogecoin?"
Investor 2: "Yep, it’s like money, but instead of paper bills – memes!" 🐕💰
Investor 1: "So you’re investing in jokes!"
Investor 2: "I’d say I’m investing in humor with the potential for a cosmic rise!" 🚀😂
Investor 1: "What do you think, is Bitcoin rising again?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, it’s like a rollercoaster! Up, down, up, down... Not sure if I want to hop on!" 🎢😂
Investor 1: "Well, only if there’s a seatbelt!" 🛑
Investor 1: "Do you still hold Dogecoin?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, and I believe it’s not just a meme, but a real trend!" 🐕💥
Investor 1: "Well, so far, the only trend is how it dances on the decline!" 💃📉
Investor 2: "Don’t worry, soon it’ll be dancing on the moon!" 🚀🌕
Investor 1: "Did you hear Bitcoin hit a new record?"
Investor 2: "Yeah, it’s like a miracle! It’s like that guy at a party who can’t stop dancing!" 🕺🎉
Investor 1: "But then, when everyone leaves, he stays, and the price drops!" 😂📉
Investor 1: "Did you really buy another meme coin?"
Investor 2: "Yep! It’s like collecting trading cards, but with a million-to-one chance!" 😂💰
Investor 1: "Well, I still think the million-to-one chance is when your coin doesn’t lose value!" 😜
Bitcoin finally hit a new record, and all the crypto investors happily started celebrating. But after a week, its price dropped. One investor says:
"Well, if I knew I’d be moving my funds into a stable currency that fast, I would’ve at least bought a stable reserve!" 😂
But a few days later, he’s investing in Bitcoin again, saying, "The market will return, and we’ll be back on top!" 🐎💸
Why did Bitcoin go to therapy?
Because it finally broke the $100,000 barrier and needed to talk about its issues.
They’ll exchange their experiences!
Because it always "blocks" the moves!
"I don’t know, I haven’t mined yet!"
They'll exchange memes, but no one will understand!
Because it’s always changing its behavior!
Because it couldn’t keep up with the main event. 🚫🎉
To ride the waves of market volatility. 🚤🌊
Because they lost their keys. 🔑💸